Good Intention Versus Rippling Effects of Advertisements

The Swacch Bharat Abhiyaan Goddess lakshmi Advertisement

Advertisements like these no doubt increase awareness by hitting at the right chords around sentiments, everyday lifestyle and not to forget the overarching ideas around how it is in our interest to take action by involving light banter and hitting where most people will relate to. However, I always wonder what are the trade offs involved.

For instance, this advetisement very interstingly would have hit a lot of people who would have gone the extra mile of saying how this is one useful way of changing habits, but is it not taking support and building on the foundations of the very cause of many issues that plague our country today - religious affiliations, beliefs, customs and resultant stereotypes?

The idea of the 'Lakshmi' going away is in itself a cause for so many customs and traditions which are illogical so as to say the least.

So here, are we making a compromise to build something on the foundations of religious customs that is in the first place plaguing us in so many ways? Hum sahara le rahe hain us cheez ka jisse hum roz ladte hain, roz ki zindagi mein ki yeh dharm ke itne vishwas aur kanoon kyun hain.

Simple soch lo. Jisme compromise bhi na ho. Kuch logo ka vishwas toh "lakshmi" ke aane aur jane pe aur bad hi gaya hoga ab. Safayi rakh lenge par apna vishwas "Lakshmi" pe banaye rakhenge. Us "lakshmi" ke liye fir chahe auroton ko yeh na kaha jaye - " tum hamare ghar ki lakshmi ho, lakshmi le kar hi aaogi" (rippling effects almost always ignored under the viel of glamour, "reason" and good intention).

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Turning 25 - To My Future Self

I never actually had the courage (honestly) to pen down what was going on in this troubled head of mine, especially after my birthday. One reason for this is because there are parts of me which are scared to reflect and to introspect. Sometimes, honesty scares me. As my best friend says, being honest can be intimidating and it is okay if people do not understand you. 

However, no matter how much intimidating honesty might be, I wish to be honest today not with you or anyone else, but me, for me. And let me warn in the beginning itself that this post too will be just a bit crazy and not so sane.

I sit down to write this in the midst of a plethora of emotions I cannot even count. I sit down to write this after watching the most beautiful documentary celebrating 25 years of my existence (heartfelt gratitude to my friends and family for this as it will always remind me of who I am). I sit down to write this amidst the fear of being honest with myself.

But alas! As I anticipated, I have no wisdom to share. All I have are words - words left after the celebrations were over, words left after the heart breaks went by, words left after being disappointed or dejected, words left after reading day in and day out, words left after slogging infinitely under the veil of hiding so many feelings and words left after 'just existing'. 

The words left after just existing are my favourite ones. Because they make me wonder frequently - What would I say to my future self? I remember doing this exercise with a bunch of kids back in India and they had such mind boggling answers to this. I was awe struck. I am not sure if my reflections would be as exciting as theirs were, but they will be honest nonetheless. Twisting this exercise to suit my needs.

Here goes the first letter to my progeny if and when she/he exists and grows up to read this (inspired from the book "Letters to Sam" by Daniel Gottlieb).

"Dear Love,

This is our first e-conversation. I am not sure who you are or how you look. But I know that you carry the same soul as mine. Feeling confused and weird? I feel the same all the time, even today. On my 25th birthday, I want to write to you. I want to tell you some things (which many books (not people) will also tell you but I just wanted to satisfy my need to pen down my thoughts as and when they come and you are kind of a forced listener to those today) I acquired over the years; no no not words of wisdom (I am sure you have that a lot more than me), but just simple musings as a result of 'just existing' in the moments that mattered the most to me. I hope you can feel them the same as I feel them everyday. After all we share the same soul.

1. Do not take advice and suggestions from anyone. They are other people's opinions. Not even your friends. Listen to them and then follow your heart. Always (I am not 'other people' though).

2. Do not get swayed by what is normal to people. Set your own normal. You want to live in a small quite place where no one knows you? Go do that while you are young. Never wait to get older to do things. People are stupid. They always have been stupid. They will tell you to 'settle down' first and earn and establish yourself and plan blah blah blah. None of this is true. Don't plan too much otherwise you will be a robot. Remember that every age and stage in life brings with it its own insights and revelations and the wish to settle down will just mess that up. So don't do that. Find your own space and decide for yourself. I will always have your back and I will walk all the way, if I am not too old to walk like literally. 

3. Do not bother too much and do not feel too much. I am assuring you it will not do you any good. Know the difference between being selfish at the cost of others and at the cost of yourself.

4. Love intensely, constantly and truly and expect nothing less in return; in fact, expect more, you deserve it. Otherwise do not love at all. You have the right to be.

5. Always listen to me. I will be right in 'most' situations, not always though.

6. Speak your mind out, as transparently as possible. No one will be able to shut you down for it will be reflected in the fierceness of your eyes. Never underestimate the power of a stare or a gaze. Always stop and stare. Do not run (even literally).

7. You will have to take so many decisions. People will say do this and then everything will be fine. Again, people are stupid. Do not take decision making as a source of stress and therefore do not give it too much importance. You will always decide on things. Its a part of life. Do not let it overpower you. And when it is overwhelming, I will always be there to listen (as my parents listen to me) or maybe we can just leave everything and go travel during these times. I will anyway travel. You can decide if you want to come with me or not.

8. Be honest with yourself. It doesn't come in easy but once it does, it will pay off well, always. We will have more on this in the future letters.

9. Don't explain yourself too much to anyone, not even me. People who love you truly will listen to you even when you are silent. Trust me this is true. Until today, even I thought it is a joke.

10. Do not depend on anyone for emotional or other needs. In the best and worst moments, you will always be alone. Always. It is meant to be like this. Those moments are kind of a celebration which are meant to be celebrated alone. No, I am not crazy.

11. People will compel you to go with the flow of the world as it is progressing and advancing blah blah blah. But if you want to be still in a particular time in history, do that. Choose your own lifestyle. It might not be defined but that is okay. Don't question mine though. This might not make much sense now.

Now you may think that how do I know all of this for I am just 25. Let me tell you that I don't know if most of this is or will be true for me. But I know that I try to live by these as much as I can everyday. I fail sometimes but I don't stop trying. And hey! this at least tells you how I felt when I was 25 and that is pretty exciting! Isn't it? Or maybe not :D

Oh and if ever you find me not following the above, I hope you can hold my hands and tell it on my face. We don't know if age gifts me with memory loss problems.

Until next letter,

Happy Birthday To Me" 

Turning 25 is not easy, you are at a pinnacle of so many decisions and transitions and emotions, of course. Things happen at the blink of an eye. But you turn 25 only once. Know that every moment is to be treasured equally as the one that just went by. Don't waste it. Seize it. Like really seize it. This is not wisdom. This is just blabbering.

Until next time,

:-)

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बहुत शर्म आती है.

I am an ardent admirer of my country, India. In fact I am one of those people who listens to patriotic songs about India on loop frequently, with that high of emotions every now and then. And why shouldn't I? India is great - its diversity, people, food, and culture is splendid.

Last night somebody asked me about India and suddenly my expressions, tone of voice and words changed to immense happiness, pride and a rush of emotions, leading to tears in my eyes. That person replied in astonishment, "I wish I could feel the same about my country."

The next morning sitting amidst an international mix of scholars working and researching on human trafficking, the focus came to India and the popular statement that most of human trafficking is in, to and via India. Women and girls being sold on a massive scale everyday. I felt ashamed. Very ashamed. Despite the gradual change (which is commendable and appreciable) in India and elsewhere across the world regarding the discourse on human trafficking, I felt very ashamed.

बहुत शर्म आती है. बहुत बहुत ज़्यादा. उससे भी ज़्यादा शर्म आती है अपने देश पे जब लोग चुप रहते हैं, बोलते नहीं. उन्हें मतलब नहीं लोगों को रोज़ बेच जा रहा है. हमारे देश के युवा, वोह भी चुप हैं. और बहुत ज़्यादा शर्म आती है जब रोज़ ज़िन्दगी में किसी न किसी तरीके से महिलाओं को कमज़ोर समझा जाता है. जब लोग बात करते हैं की कैसे भारत में महिलाओं को छोटी से बड़ी हर बात में दबाया जाता है.

P.S. I feel ashamed, sad and angry not just for the prevalence of human trafficking in India (and across the world), but all human rights violations happening right now as we read this in my country - in Kashmir, against women, against Dalits (and the havoc that casteism plays), against the LGBT community, besides all other important issues.

What is mind boggling (and frustrating) is that us - the "21st century" generation, so called "young change makers" and "drivers of the future" people are busy pursuing a lucrative career and a "well settled" life. No, I am not judging. Everybody has a right to choose the kind of life they want.

And in no way do I expect everyone to be a full time social activist. That would be unreasonable because after all we need each profession to be working not just for the wider national economy, but even for our individual lives. However, I feel ashamed when many people do not have an opinion about these issues, they simply do not care, they are content in being ignorant, they do not raise their voice where they can and should, in the small tiny private spaces, (leave alone the public ones). It is absolutely disgusting to not be able to understand as to how none of this concerns each one of us!

We are at a critical phase in history, being at the juncture of witnessing and living through some of the most critical and deciding events of our time. This is "our time" and if we are to behave ignorant, I have no clue what the generations after us are to make of us. I will not blame them for judging us.

"if not now, then when"??!!

In national and international solidarity.

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